Got back the critique of my screenplay Distant Enemies from the BlueCat Screenwriting Contest. Although I didn't win any cash prizes, I was encouraged by the feedback. The anonymous critic agreed, I think, with Randall Jahnson, my Northwest Film Center's screenwriting teacher, that my script was a solid attempt. The BlueCat critic wrote that my plot was "fresh and original". He thought my plot twist was "a fine touch by the writer". He noted the "pod" element in my script, and it's reference to "Invasion of the Body Snatchers". He said my handling of the pods was "neither unoriginal nor identical" to the earlier films. True enough.
About my character portrayals, he wrote, "There was an array of characters ... each of them gave a powerful image and had their own individuality that made the story stronger and fluid. It was quite disheartening to see some of the characters die off or appeared (sic) to have died." That sympathetic reaction was exactly my intention. I love dialogue writing and the character it reveals.
On the negative side, both screenwriter Randall Jahnson and the anonymous BlueCat critic thought the action in the middle segment of my screenplay was slowed down by elements that might be eliminated or shortened. I'll definitely see where action can be sped up in future rewrites. The fact that two separate writers agreed about this belt line sluggishness, made the suggestion specially forceful.
Finally, my anonymous critic encouraged me when he wrote "Distant Enemies is a solid script and could be rewritten to improve the pacing." I agree wholeheartedly.
Tonight, my Tuesday night 6:30 - 9:30 screenwriting course begins at NW Film Center in downtown Portland. Teacher will be Randall Jahnson. If you've been following my bucket list quest, you'll recall that I took time off from rewriting novels to write a science fiction film two summers [or so?] back. I enjoyed the process and thought I might be able to do that in my declining memory years. One-hundred pages of film script is easier to keep in mind than a 500 page novel. Two of my novels are open to turning into film scripts.
For the past week, I've been full of fear about the course, telling myself I have nothing more to say, telling myself I'll be out of place among young writers, imagining they'll laugh at this 79 year old codger trying to turn out film scripts. I questioned myself violently, doubting everything about myself and hit myself over the noggin with my financially unsuccessful writing career. I experienced moments of fear that reminded me of the fears I felt when I put the bottle down 40-some years ago, i.e. how will I be funny and pick up girls...I'll be so alone, etcetera. One fear was about the expense of parking in Portland, then I looked into taking the Max line in from PDX but was deterred from that by my fear of standing at 9:30 pm in downtown Portland waiting for the Max line to show. They run the last two runs to PDX at 9:55 and 10:30. I truly want to learn to take the Max line into Portland, so I'm compromising tonight. I drove in to park expensively in a garage near the school, then I'll look around as I leave the school at 9:30 to see how scary it might feel at the stop I'd need to wait at.
First draft of my film script is done. Still no name. Yesterday, during my walking time at the local Walmart—where I never buy anything—I thought for sure something would arrive from the muse about a name for my script, but, no, nada.
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| Paul Cézanne |
This morning I did some reworking of the first three paragraphs of my novel, Ghoul World. I want the agent/reader to get caught up real quick. I'm thinking I might go to the library and read the first three paragraphs of several dozen novels. At least, the opening paragraphs of the most popular novels. Of course, I have that many novels on my own book shelves, but do I want to read the first three paragraphs of only great literature? I don't think that's the best way to go for someone whose goal is "to get someone other than myself to publish a novel (or produce a film) I've written".
Of course, the oft repeated statement that the opening paragraphs are so very important has a major hole in it. What about the 4th paragraph? The first chapter? Don't forget, I tell myself, an agent/reader can dive into the first three paragraphs of your book and then get tired of swimming somewhere on page ten if the writing doesn't continue to interest. How many novels have I begun, then set aside after several chapters? Well...........okay, not many. I'm addicted to reading.
In the last analysis, all these tricks of the trade mean nothing if one can't write an interesting tale with engaging characters. Does the motto, FINISH STRONG, ring anyone's bell?
The query for Angie's Choice I sent by mail came back today, the one that reminded me of how much work it took to send off a query in the old days. I sent it off to the Zoe Pagnamenta agency. She answered within two weeks. NO! I had high hopes for it because of the methodology of the query. Don't know why printing out and mailing my query and sample felt more hopeful. Emotions are mysterious things even though they command our every deed and thought. I need to push the sci fi novel, Ghoul World, more forcefully. I let it languish, but it's a very interesting idea that ought to get at least a moment's attention somewhere.
On a positive note, yesterday, this writer's blog which also goes to a page I manage on Facebook , The Silent Boomer, received 221 hits. People are watching to see what might happen to me in my quest to "get someone other than myself to publish a novel I've written." Or "to produce a movie I've written." Thanks to all who follow my journey. Many days now, I think it's time to fold up the writer's table and leave the dusty old bazaar to other scribes much younger than myself.
One very interesting thing about writing a movie script. The length of a 90 minute film takes from 90 to 120 pages. I've discovered that my elderly memory is able to keep track of 120 pages more easily than it tracks a plot and subplots through 400 to 500 pages of ms. I've already got several story lines in mind for films that I can't share because they are quite interesting. On my death bed, I'll tell all.
My wife on New Year's Day bought a car that looks just like the one to your left. Recently, another short story was rejected of the four I sent off with very high hopes. Two remain out in the world unaccounted for.
My spirits aren't very high today, but it has nothing to do with rejections. I didn't sleep well last night. When I'm tired, my experience is that negativity can get a foot in the door and kick my ass, but the work on my science fiction film script continues apace. Today was productive. Will wait patiently for tomorrow.
Speaking of low spirits, off in the corner of the coffee shop I'm writing in, two men are talking loudly about their ideas about their god. One's voice is labored and stumbling. His voice is precisely the voice, intonation and rhythms of a young child repeating to a parent what he has learned in Sunday school, but the man's in his 70s or 80s. Of course, his way of speaking might be the result of a stroke. It's that halting and labored. Makes me very sad about fundamentalist religious folk. And fearful too.
My current reading is Yukio Mishima's The Sound of Waves.
